Only The Curious

Okay, so I’m moving. In a week. This is something I’ve dreamed of doing for years and years and now it’s a week away and I barely feel like it’s even happening, except that I’m all nervous and weird about it so I know something important is happening. I had always pictured this week as being a joyride of looking forward to leaving, getting ready, everything like that. But at the moment I’m mostly in denial and eating copious amounts of ice cream.

It’s not that I’m not excited – I am. How could I not be? I’m fulfilling a life-long dream. I’ve even got a few things lined up and happening out there, so it’s getting more and more real by the day. I guess the joy of it just hasn’t quite hit me yet. I keep saying it probably won’t until I’ve been there long enough to realize that I’m there, and I’m not on vacation.

I guess I didn’t think I would be so sad. In the past, the times when I most intensely thought about moving were usually the times when things weren’t going well – when I felt a lack of friends, I had just been laid off or a relationship had just ended, or all of those at once. But that’s not the case now.

I love my friends. I love my boyfriend. I love my family. And they’re all here.

But I feel like it’s better to be leaving on good terms. I’ll always have all of those things to come back to. And I’m going to Colorado to pursue something, rather than to run away from things.

I’m glad I’m doing it now, though. Two years ago I would’ve left and not looked back. A year from now and those attachments that are making me sad to leave now might stop me in my tracks completely.

Things happen in their perfect time. And mine seems to be NOW.

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