Only The Curious

I took November off from blogging. This wasn’t really intentional; I never sat down and said “I’m not blogging for a month.” In fact, I’ve felt really guilty about it. But the hiatus was part of me continuing to get my shit together. Ever since April, when I didn’t get what I thought was my dream job and kind of fell apart, I’ve been going through a slow process figuring out what I do want out of life, and of getting myself back to standing on solid ground. In November, part of this was getting back to budgeting and goal setting, and as a result of doing both, I made a rule that I always had to do all of my billable work first. Before blogging, before anything distracting, I had to get my billable work done.

It’s both a good and a bad thing that has meant no blogging. Good that I have that much work. Bad because I need my personal writing outlet too. I’ll find a balance.

But back to that good news. I haven’t had a “real” job since last March. I’ve had a couple of part-time, contract gigs, but no regular, steady-income, 9-5 job. I’ve been writing, and doing some social media consulting, and trying to “make it” working on my own terms. As of this past month, I’ve finally reached a point where I can say that my freelance work is my job, and my jobs are my side gigs. I’m just $300 short of what I used to make on salary (okay, that’s admittedly not all that much, but still,) and am optimistic about my business continuing to grow.

Hold the champagne, though. I know full well the folly of thinking that one good month means smooth sailing from here on out. I know that I’ll need to continue to push myself and constantly be reaching out to new potential clients. And while I managed to pay all of my bills without pulling out the credit card this month, there’s still a lot of room for growth. For example, if I’d like to have the money for something wild and crazy. Like a savings account.

But, I am really excited that my patience and not really even scraping by the last six months looks like it’s finally paying off. I couldn’t have possibly done it without the support of a couple of very important people, and since I never did a Thanksgiving gratitude post, I’d like to thank them here:

THANK YOU…

…Alisha. For standing by me, letting me vent, and helping me to laugh through the tough times. For getting angry on my behalf when I didn’t have the energy to care or fight for myself anymore. For going out to five points to rescue my stolen iPhone. For upholding our “no-judgment” policy. For making me feel normal again during those worst times.

…Heather. For letting me “live” with you, even though I was almost never there and it kind of got us evicted. For never judging me, and for being so chill and understanding, and for trusting that I’ll pay you back when I can and not letting rent get in the way of friendship. Also for inspiring me to get stronger.

…John. For giving me so many opportunities to sing and perform and explore new music, and for being so encouraging about it. It made me feel like I was accomplishing something even when work didn’t seem to be going anywhere. But more than that, thanks for always welcoming me with a smile and a hug, for asking how I’m doing and letting me talk for half an hour after rehearsal was done because I just needed someone to spill to.

…Zac. Because I know you’d be there for me no matter what. Even though we haven’t gotten to hang out as much as we’d like, knowing that you’re there makes me feel like I have a safety net. And thank you for encouraging me with the music, too.

…Karl. Thank you for believing in me and being there for me from day one. For helping me move at the last second, for not giving up on the possibility of us, even when I didn’t see it. For making me meet you for coffee just to make sure I got dressed and left the house that weekend. For making sure I never went without dinner, and convincing me that using a slow-cooker would not, in fact, turn me into a mediocre housewife. For all of the ways you’ve supported me – financially, emotionally, and even physically. For driving all the way to and from Wisconsin on your own, and not begrudging it later. For giving me a home. Most of all, for loving me, and letting me know that you would still love me even through those tough times.

______

Look for posts daily for the rest of December, and sometimes two. I’m participating in #reverb10, a blogging inspiration project devoted to reflection on the past year and intention for the coming one.

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Yesterday I was writing about how the biggest thing that I hear from my traditionally employed friends is that they could never go without the security of their paycheck. And someone made a great point in the comments that job security is kind of a fallacy.

When you’re self-employed, it’s simply a different kind of security. To me, it’s just a redefinition, and one that I prefer for three reasons:

1) I can’t get laid off. Nobody else is going to tell me when I’m done working. Even if, say, all the publications I’m writing for go out of business (R.I.P. Wisconsin Woman) I can just go find more gigs elsewhere. Or if that doesn’t work, I can just take my work in a different direction, like working more with web copy. Which brings me to my second point:

2) I can take steps to prevent a downturn for my business. When you run your own business, you are both more in touch with your clients’ needs and more able to respond to them. Instead of going down with the ship, I can change course. If the service I’m offering isn’t one my clients want, I can look at what they do want, and adjust to it. You create your own security by catering to your clients’ needs. The key to this is that you have to put their needs ahead of your own desires when it comes to your business. If they’re not going to pay you for whatever it is you want to do, hold on to that idea and figure out how you can use your skills to provide the service they need.

3) Multiple Streams of Income. To me, this is the heart of stability and security for the self-employed. Even when I have had full-time jobs, I was always freelancing and doing massage on the side. As I’ve mentioned a few times, having someone else tell me that I will only earn X amount per month is the opposite of security to me. Being able to control my income and earn more than my salary every month – that’s great. Not to mention that whenever I was between jobs, it was okay, because I could just work harder on marketing my other businesses, so even though I’ve been unemployed several times, I’ve never actually been without a source of income.

Even if my primary income source disappears, I always have something to fall back on. That’s a kind of security that traditional employment simply cannot provide. Traditional employment favors experts – people who having one job in one field with one skill set- but even for them, it can be a very eggs-in-one-basket kind of deal. Even if you’re THE expert, if your company goes out of business, you’re out of work. I have several interests. I love learning. Therefore, I prefer to have several fields and skill sets, so even if one dries up, I always have something else already in the works.

Admittedly, entrepreneurship will never have the stability of traditional work. There will always be ups and downs to deal with, and never a set payscale to count on. We the self-employed always need to have more savings on hand for the dry spells, and be willing to cut back if necessary. But, with multiple sources of income, self-employment can have more security than any traditional job will ever be able to offer. Having been laid off three times myself, I’ll trade my short-term stability for my long-term security any day.

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To be self-employed or to be an employee, that is the question. It’s a subject that I wrestle with frequently, because I understand the pros and cons of each, and have been on both sides multiple times over the last 5 years. If you look at my resume, you’ll see that I usually have an office job from October through May, and then am freelancing, doing massage, or maybe working part-time in a gourmet kitchen store over the summer. It hasn’t been intentional; several of those lapses were due to layoffs. But it is interesting. The one year that I had a job during the month of May, it took me weeks to figure out why I was so antsy. Then I realized “oh, this is the time of year where I’m usually sitting by the lake with books like “Making a Living Without a Job””

To be honest, my heart lies in the self-employment camp. Unfortunately, my need to pay for things like my car and my health insurance (funny thing happens when you don’t regularly hold an office job: you don’t get benefits. More on that later…) frequently land me back in an office job.

I could write out a list of all the reasons I prefer self-employment, but Everett Bogue did a pretty darn good job of that earlier this week in his post: “27 Reasons You Should Never Have a Job.” I LOVED IT.

The only thing I would add is this: when I tell people I’m self-employed, they’ll often say “oh I could never do that. I need more security. Isn’t it scary not knowing how much you’re going to make every month?” Um, sometimes. Yeah, there are dry months. But you know what scares me more? Knowing I’m only going to make X amount every month. When you’re self-employed, there is endless potential for growth. I don’t have to wait for incremental raises; my salary could double (or more) in a year because one of my income streams takes off. If there’s a trip I really want to go on or something I really want to buy, I just push for a few more clients. Voila, extra money.

Yes, being self-employed is volatile. You need to save more for the down times and it’s important to have supportive friends, family, and/or significant others. But for me, ultimately, the freedom, flexibility, creativity, and potential are overwhelmingly worth it.

That is not to say, however, that I think everyone should be self-employed. It’s not for the risk-averse, or those who need stability. As Matt Cheuvront said today, Don’t Discount the Value of a 9-to-5.

I will admit that, being self-employed, I’ve spent months being broke while trying to build one income stream or another. It’s stressful. It can be lonely. The thing I miss most about having an office job is the social aspect – having co-workers to grab lunch or hit happy hour with. Not to mention brainstorming. And yeah, the stability is nice.

There are reasons for both ways of working. What I think is most important, though, is the mindset you take to your work. You can’t go into business for yourself thinking like an employee, and yet the most successful employees are the ones who go to work thinking like an entrepreneur. More on that tomorrow.

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